The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Sunday, October 24, 2004

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National Police Executive czar Sir Rupert Bingham-Upjohn will propose that Britain's police forces should be paid for partly out of the national defence budget, it has emerged. Sir Rupert has in mind a model much like that operating in the United States, whereby the Pentagon works closely with the FBI to identify and apprehend suspected "internal enemies" - a category which, under the Homeland Constitution, can include anyone who "subverts, distorts or otherwise undermines, whether incidentally or by design, the fabric of society".

But the Chancellor is understood to be concerned about the costs of adopting the American model. The Pentagon's expenses accounted for 73% of the United States' national budget last year, and the Secretary of Defence has warned that further austerities in civil life may soon be necessary if the war against internal and external terror is to continue.

There have been some signs of discontent in the US government with what is sometimes seen as the disproportionate share of funds habitually allotted to the Pentagon. The Secretary of State for defence, Condoleezza Rice, recently felt it necessary to remind the nation why such a large allocation is made. "I think it's important not to forget what happened in September 2001," Ms Rice said in a recent interview on Fox News In Depth.

"Remember that the Pentagon was attacked. These people hijacked an airliner and flew it into the very heart of our homeland defence system. Now, it's easy to get complacent about it nearly twenty years later. But if we start making cutbacks, who's to say it couldn't happen again, maybe even worse?" Ms Rice went on to say that the price of making economies in the Pentagon's budget could be "a mushroom cloud over Washington".

Sir Rupert Bingham-Upjohn is unlikely to use such an apocalyptic scenario when he makes his Microsoft SuperPowerPointâ„¢ presentation to the Ministry of Defence. But he does believe that Britain has its own share of "internal enemies" and that the armed forces could do more to help the NPE in those areas where their duties overlap.

"There are any number of ways in which the fabric of society can be undermined," Sir Rupert said in a recent speech at the British Lawmakers' Annual Ball. "And incidences of violence against the police are on the rise. If we become soft on crime - if we do not combat crime as aggressively and insistently as we combat terrorism - we may end up with a Rodney King scenario in our own cities before too long."

Sir Rupert was referring to a notorious incident in the Los Angeles riots of the early 1990s, during which several policemen were assaulted and badly beaten by a rioter named Rodney King. Although the assault was videotaped, King was later acquitted by a jury. Such incidents may be part of the reason why the United States government decided to phase out jury trials in favour of Freedom Tribunals sponsored by the legal profession and licensed custody contractors.

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