Do Think Again

The Secretary for Healthcare Privatisation, Twizzler Lansley, has been wagging the finger at GPs who are striking over pension cuts. In his usual democratic manner, the Twizzler has ruled that a day of industrial action is much the same thing as a one-off holiday, and has instructed the beneficiaries to repay his goodwill by working an extra Saturday. "The action GPs will take could potentially displace up to 1.25m appointment bookings in primary care into the days and weeks following your strike - including appointments for some 140,000 children," warned the angel of mercy who has done so much to protect frontline services. "As GPs understand better than anyone, today's routine appointments can become tomorrow's emergencies," moralised the Hippocratic paragon who wants to turn GPs into bureaucrats and who tried to legislate away his own responsibility for the country's health. "Industrial action gains doctors nothing, will harm patients, and leaves you isolated from other major NHS unions. Do think again," urged the Twizzler, whose Health and Social Care Act gains doctors nothing, will harm patients, and has isolated the Twizzler himself from almost nobody except the public and the medical profession.