The Curmudgeon


Saturday, September 20, 2014

Waking Westminster

Date: Fri 19 Sep 2014 8:00pm Europe/London
Subject: Caledonistan referendum bumsqueak

Dear Colleagues

The referendum has been a wake-up call because of the extent to which voters have unexpectedly become involved in politics. The foundational appetite of the electorate was for change. The overwhelming emotion is one of politician-oriented negativity and situational rejectionism due in part to perceived excessive homogenisation paradigms. The Caledonistan separatists succeeded in part due to voter communicativity exchanges at basement level which we have commenced forthwith. This will be ongoing subject to human resource feasibility factors. Movement Not Machine must be our slogan and our infotain-distributivity must be set to Plebbo Max. We won because only 45% of the country wanted to leave when it saw all the talent we had. We must balance changing the electorate with reassurance to business. We must embrace the harmonisation of diversification to synthesise a new and beautiful orchestrational solution. We must offer faster, safer and better change without compromising the stability provided by the free market. Consideration of contemporaneous psephological phenomena indicates minor positive potential for ostensible human beings utilising demotic idioms.

Onward to thirty per cent,

Douglas Alexander MP

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