The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Sunday, July 05, 2015

Collateral Opportunification

Thanks to the Osbornomic miracle, of course, the National Health Service is not in crisis; people with long-term illnesses are thriving on the Government's cripple-kicking therapy; schoolchildren are being driven into nervous breakdowns only because their teachers have so much time for them; and food banks the length and breadth of the country are being swept away on the tide of general plenty. Accordingly, Britain's Head Boy has announced that his cash-strapped Government will be using the income from penalties imposed on the banks to fund a bit of posturing over terrorist atrocities. Although the Government is doing everything it can to encourage personal responsibility in healthcare, employment, house-building and profiteering, it seems that the hard-working families of terrorist victims cannot be trusted to build their own memorials, thereby necessitating a quasi-Socialist intervention to remind future generations of the need for constant vigilance and continued wog-bombing.

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