The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Tuesday, August 15, 2017

Alternative Facts

Even in the United States, cancer sufferers who use fake remedies are more likely to die than those treated with actual medicine, according to research which is merely scientific. A team from Yale University found that almost four-fifths of cancer patients who relied on medical treatment were still alive after five years, compared with just over half of those who relied on placebos and confidence tricks. Nevertheless, "anecdotal evidence from some" - always an infallible source in these enlightened times - proclaims that cancer can be cured by homeopathic remedies. Our own Minister for Healthcare Profitability has himself been known to shill for snake-oil on occasion; although in his case it's unclear whether he is stupid enough to believe it will cure anyone of anything, or whether he is operating on the traditional British socio-economic principle that what doesn't work is often cheaper than what does.

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